The drama has been acted out.
What follows represents the final installment of my column “The Un-Barable Truth.” In less than two weeks, I will graduate and bid Saint Xavier farewell. As a result, I have chosen to offer an honest reflection of my experiences here.
Perhaps some readers will find grains of wisdom somewhere in this. I don’t know, but I cannot think of a more appropriate way to mark the occasion.
In truth, my Saint Xavier experience did not begin as well as it ended. FOCUS 2009 did not impress me. I remember finding it long, boring, cumbersome and exhausting. With the exception of a peaceful midnight stroll around Lake Marion and a delicious meatball dinner, the entire ordeal did nothing for me.
Others clearly benefited from it, but I couldn’t wait to go home. There was a stale “smallness” to everything here that initially turned me off (little did I know that this “smallness” would eventually become the school’s greatest asset for me).
Freshman year was more of the same. As a commuter, I fell into the usual rut that I observe many commuters falling into today—wake up, drive to school, stay for class, leave.
I could not find anywhere to belong, and I pretty much accepted that I would coast through college as a nonentity.
The turning point began during the summer of 2010. I was looking for a job. After several failed interviews, I finally checked Cougar Jobs.
I saw that The Xavierite (a publication that I was vaguely aware of and certainly never read) was looking for writers. I applied, expecting nothing.
A few days later I received an email from Peter Kreten, the current Director of Student Media. I will not torment you with details. Suffice it to say I was hired, and I eventually worked my way up to Editor in Chief senior year and ran the whole paper, developing a love for writing in the process.
The Xavierite was the first place I found belonging on campus. It gave me opportunities to develop skills and confidence which I could apply to all other aspects of my college career.
It allowed me to talk to many interesting and even famous people. Finally, it ensured that I would have some sort of lasting legacy on campus. Thank you, Pete.
With newfound confidence, I was ready to tackle another challenge—the Honors Senior Project.
I originally had intended to refuse entering the Honors program, an intention that was altered only thanks to a friendly phone call from Dr. Hiltner the summer preceding my freshman year.
Even so, I was considering dropping out so as to avoid having to do the giant senior project, which involved a public presentation, something I feared entirely.
With growing confidence my junior year, however, I tackled it head on with the help of my mentor, Dr. Lopez, and ended up presenting it not only at SXU, but also at Purdue. I would never have even considered this during my freshman year. Thank you, Dr. Hiltner and Dr. Lopez.
However, all of this paled in comparison to the beast that I had been dreading all four years—student teaching.
I had heard mostly negativities regarding the American education system, and I questioned my resolve to continue on in my major many times. I saw many peers drop out over the years, but I believed in finishing what I started and trudged on.
I was assigned to Summit Hill Junior High for student teaching, and my cynical attitude toward education did a 180.
My cooperating teacher, mentor and friend Steve Evenhouse helped me further to develop my confidence as he gradually scaffolded me into running his class.
The kids were wonderful, the staff was extremely supportive and I even received a new nickname—“Bara-cuda.”
I grew more during student teaching than I had the four years prior. Thank you, Steve.
So things turned around for me during my time at SXU, and I am thankful that they did. No doubt, Saint Xavier’s small size allowed for opportunities that would not be present in larger institutions, something that the university should be proud of.
I will not belabor you with life lessons that I learned or anything like that—I trust that you can figure those out based upon what I have already written.
Admittedly, it’s hard to come up with an appropriate way to end your last column. How about an inspirational Latin phrase? Those are cool.
Vincit Qui Se Vincit
Tony Bara
Viewpoints Correspondent