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I want to preface this article by saying I have absolutely no idea where this going. I normally have a pretty concrete idea or theme for my articles, but this one is going to be a compilation of some of the random thoughts that have been floating around in my head recently that I want to try to make sense of.
I anticipate that everyone will interpret this article a little differently. And I find myself being completely content with that. I do not know where I am going to end up, but I hope you enjoy the ride and as usual, can relate to at least one or two things I’ve said.
As I sat in Starbucks by myself one morning this week (not in a creepy way, I promise), I began reminiscing on my time here at Saint Xavier.
I thought back to my freshman year and how much has changed since then. Each year has brought different experiences, different people and a different Bridget. I have held on to maybe two good friends from that year, the rest of the close friends that I have now came into my life at various other points throughout the journey.
I guess there really is no explanation of the timing of someone’s entrance into your life. But I have found one pattern. It seems that every time a friend or contact faded out of my life (for whatever reason) I may have lost the friend I had, but I gained the one I needed. I am not a huge believer in divine intervention. But I do believe that sometimes we are put into the right place or situation at the right time. Not necessarily because something spectacular or life changing is going to happen, but simply because there is something we must learn or gain from that relationship.
Unfortunately, I’ve found that those lessons are not always pleasant. It may not be something we would have wanted or asked for, but we need it nonetheless. It is this thought that reminds me of a quote by author Pema Chodron, “Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know”.
Sometimes those lessons are confusing and heartbreaking, sometimes they’re beautiful and life changing, and sometimes we do not even realize what those lessons are until years later when we are far enough removed from situation to understand what it may have taught us.
And not every person we come in contact with will have a recognizable impact. In fact, I also believe that some people we meet will just be the vehicles in which we ride to people that are going to be very important to us, or change our lives. I believe this firmly because I have two really concrete examples of this in my life. I met my two best friends through two separate failed relationships. The two people that are responsible for introducing me to my best friends are no longer in my life.
At the time, the loss of those people seemed like a disaster and a tragedy. It was not until I was a little further past the pain that I realized so much beauty had been born out of the ashes of those unfortunate endings.
There’s a good chance none of this makes any sense and I might be crazy (just kidding, I am definitely crazy) but I refuse to believe that we come in contact with certain people and not others just by chance or coincidence.
Maybe this is just my justification for the unfortunate situations and relationships I’ve experienced throughout my lifetime. After all, as humans we tend to do that, don’t we? We look for reasons to assure ourselves that our suffering, happiness and mistakes have some type of higher purpose.
We don’t want to suffer for no reason or even be happy for no reason and I think that is ok.
In the end, our successful relationships, our failed relationships, people and things that have stayed, and people and things that faded away all contribute to who we are.
We are ultimately just a sum of everyone and everything that has happened to us. It is confusing, chaotic, heart breaking and beautiful, kind of like this article and kind of like life.
Bridget Goedke
Senior Viewpoints Editor
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