We have all been in the dreaded situation where a friend or relative asks us a question and we know the answer we give will inevitably hurt their feelings. This has happened at one point or another to everyone. The big question here is, should you tell the truth even though you know it will affect the other person’s feelings or should you lie to make them feel better?
The most well-known example of this is if someone asks you if they look bad in an outfit. Most of the time you tell them that they look good and ask why they would even think they looked bad. The only time you would actually tell them they looked bad is if it would draw unwanted attention to them.
Personally, I have told a little white lie to avoid hurting someone’s feelings. This often occurred when my sister asked if her outfit looked good and I said yes even though in my opinion, it did not. The downside to lying about something as small as an outfit is if they find out about it, it breaks down some of their confidence. The plus side to it is it builds up their confidence while they are wearing something they like other than wearing an outfit to please others.
What if they ask you a more personal question? Do you still lie or do you tell them the truth? The truth tends to hurt a lot less than finding out you were lied to. I would want to know the truth when I am taking time out of my day to ask someone their opinion.
Telling the truth is not always easy and people often times can get angry hearing it. After they realize the advice that was given actually was to benefit them, they tend to become more appreciative of your honesty. Everyone always says they would rather hear the truth, but that is not always the case.
I have heard people say it was so much better not knowing the truth, while others say the truth set them free. A person I know got out of a toxic relationship and found out her ex had cheated during the relationship said to me that being told the truth made it easier to not regret breaking up with them. Another person told me they wish they would have never found out their ex cheated because it made them feel like their whole relationship was a lie, even the good parts of it.
When a person asks you for your opinion, it is your decision whether a little white lie is okay or the truth is called for. If you feel your heart start to race and your hands get clammy about the thought of lying, then don’t lie. Be mature about it and tell them the truth the way you would want them to tell you the truth. Treat people the way you would like to be treated. Telling the truth not only sets the person hearing the truth free but sets you free from the burden of carrying around something that could hurt your loved one if someone else were to tell them.
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