In the few last days, I have been reading social media comments regarding the last statement Pope Francis made in favor of civil laws recognizing homosexual unions. It was a statement that quickly became popular in everyday social media trends. Growing up Catholic and knowing how closed-minded some of the members of my church could be, I knew the comments would extremely harsh and against such a statement.
It made me realize voices often arise enhancing the image of a Church that seems not to welcome or speak about the issue of homosexuality and that, moreover, present as incompatible the experience of faith with the possibility of embracing a sexual orientation other than heterosexual.
Given this, we Catholics have a lot to do, trying new approaches and avoiding the damage that we have previously caused on many occasions. We see with concern, according to the experience of some gays and lesbians, that certain ways of transmitting Catholic teaching can also reproduce the discriminatory discourses and practices that it claims to condemn, in particular when violence is legitimized in the name of God.
The ecclesial tradition has not been fully aware that homosexuality is rather a condition that is discovered and not the consequence of a choice. Many times – still today – the wrong idea that sexual orientation is chosen is repeated. We talk about the sexual options and we contribute to many thinking that, just as we choose to be straight or homosexual, we can also change and stop being it. In this way, we fall into defining homosexuality as a promiscuous, liberal, and narcissistic lifestyle that is based solely on prejudice and ignorance, naturalizing behaviors and traits that would not be typical of a certain sexual orientation.
It is extremely necessary to update the knowledge about homosexuality within the Catholic Church. Do it based on the new knowledge that emerges from science and the experience of personal encounters with gays and lesbians. Fundamentally to recognize that homosexuality is not limited to sexual relations between people of the same sex. There is no necessary relationship between sexual orientation and conduct (behavior, act). Currently, it is held that an individual is discovering himself as a homosexual. This is not a personal choice, but rather a fundamental disposition or unelected orientation. Therefore, there is no moral responsibility involved in being homosexual.
Given the above, any supported device should set itself, as a first task, to listen to the particular way in which the subject is situated regarding their sexuality and desire.
In this way, give place to discomfort, questions, and/or concerns within the helping relationship, without forcing them to assume what they do not want, nor imposing the ideals and beliefs of the person who provides that support.
As long as we are not able to recognize the homosexual person as a legitimate other, every attempt to offer help will end up misdirecting and orienting itself based on criteria that have little or nothing to do with the person.
For this, work is required on the prejudices that hinder this relationship and that are not only present in the individual, but also in the culture and the ways in which we have traditionally organized relationships between men and women.
In order to guarantee this aid process, we consider that it is essential that the person conducting this accompaniment is aware of their own biography and the attitudes that are mobilized in each personal encounter: their sexist, cultural, racial, and gender beliefs and prejudices. gender and others, noting the limitations of their own perspectives and interpretations.