Bristol Renaissance Faire: These Aren’t Your Grandma’s Nerds

When you think of a renaissance faire, you probably think about sweaty nerds dressed like magicians, wearing their mother’s shower curtains.

Now, when I think of a renaissance faire, I see magnificent costumes and actors, I see shops upon shops of handmade crafts, I see a knightly joust. These are things I have all seen at the Bristol Renaissance Faire.

The Bristol Renaissance Faire is in Bristol, WI, almost directly off of the highway. When you arrive, you pay a small fee to park and are directed to your designated parking spot. You then make the small trek up to the giant gates.

You can either buy your tickets at the counter or you can have a pre-bought ticket from CVS. A ticket costs only $20. You walk through the gate and are immediately thrust into the year 1574.

There is so much to do at the renaissance faire, that it is almost impossible to do everything in one day! With twenty stages for performances, the faire always has something going on that will appeal to your tastes. Along the way to the different activities there are shops lined up, each selling handmade and unique goods.

Fairies roam the grounds in a graceful way, greeting children as they play.
Fairies roam the grounds in a graceful way, greeting children as they play.

There are sword crafters, armor shops, renaissance and occult book stores, and even costume shops. The faire has so much to offer; you should always come with a full wallet and be willing to spend a good amount of money.

There are actors everywhere and you can’t differentiate between actors and other guests because almost everyone is dressed in intricate costumes. When coming across an actor or actress, if you look them in the eye for any period of time they will take that as consent to talk to you.

Look the wrong people in the eye and they will make a fool of themselves and take you along for the ride. The characters of the renaissance faire are all beautifully different.

There are fairies, knights, trolls, ogres, and even a queen.

Yes, they have the queen. Queen Elizabeth I greets people all day and is a lovely woman to speak to. She is always followed around by her court which consists of at least six guards and two handmaidens.

The queen holds a parade in the middle of the day, making her way towards the jousting arena where she hosts the Queen’s Joust. Each day holds three different kinds of jousts, all ending in the Joust to the Death.

Actors face each other in an arena and fight until they are the last man standing. The stadium is separated into four sections and each section is given a knight.

There are your typical two “good and evil” knights, each facing each other for different reasons. After the final joust of the day, you can make your way towards the middle of the park and find a seat for the Drum Jam.

Musicians from all over the faire attend the Drum Jam and set up a large circle of drummers and percussionists to play and dance. People are encouraged to join in on the dancing and pull up a drum if you purchased one that day. If you’re feeling lazy, you can lounge in the skychairs in the skychair store.

All throughout the faire the one thing everyone agrees on is the fact that they have some really good food. People line up in lines that go down the road to get turkey leg and a bowl of stewed mushrooms.

The portion sizes compare to their renaisance counterparts. The faire actually compares their turkey legs to the size of an infant child! When you are at the Renaissance faire, be sure to tip the waitresses because they ring a loud bell, and shout a greatful thanks at you. It’s quite amusing

The Bristol Renaissance Faire starts up every year on July 6 and runs through Labor Day. It is open only on the weekends, but the limited schedule is worth every bit of the waiting you do during the year.

The faire itself receives thousands of visitors each day it is open. People from around the country visit Bristol to experience this very faire. The tickets are only $20 for an adult and are sold at convenience stores around our area at a discounted price at some places.

The faire is great for families and children. It is a great atmosphere and it is a great time for everyone. It is definately something that I look forward to each year.

Kristen Mabry
Features Editor